CHAPTER 18
Emma's seventh birthday party was rescheduled.
It was held at a children's museum, with dozens of kids and parents and more cake than anyone could eat.
Emma was happy.
She was running around with her friends, laughing and smiling and having the time of her life.
I watched her, and I felt a surge of emotion.
She was alive.
She was okay.
She was happy.
That was all that mattered.
---
Mark was there too.
He was standing in the corner, watching Emma with a look of pure love on his face.
He hadn't said much since we'd arrived.
But I knew he was grateful.
Grateful that Emma was alive.
Grateful that she was healthy.
Grateful that he hadn't lost her.
I walked over to him.
"Hey," I said.
"Hey."
"Are you okay?"
"Yeah. I'm okay."
"Are you sure?"
"Yeah. I'm sure."
He turned to face me.
"Lauren," he said.
"Mark."
"I'm so sorry."
"I know."
"I should have told you everything. I should have trusted you."
"Yes. You should have."
"I know."
"But you didn't."
"I know."
"I don't know if I can ever trust you again."
"I know."
"But I'm willing to try."
"Lauren, I don't deserve you."
"I know."
"But I'm grateful you're giving me a chance."
"I'm grateful you're still alive."
"I'm grateful Emma's okay."
"Me too."
We stood there in silence, watching Emma play.
"Can we try again?" he asked.
"Try again?"
"Try to be a family again."
"I don't know."
"Please. I know I've made mistakes. I know I've lied and cheated and betrayed you. But I love you, Lauren. I love Emma. I want to be a better husband. I want to be a better father."
"Mark, I don't know if I can ever forgive you."
"I know."
"But I can try."
"Thank you."
"I'm not promising anything."
"I know."
"But I'll try."
"Thank you, Lauren."
He pulled me into a hug.
I didn't hug him back.
But I didn't push him away.
I was trying.
---
Rachel was at the party too.
She was standing on the other side of the room, watching Emma with a look of regret on her face.
I walked over to her.
"Hey," I said.
"Hey."
"Are you okay?"
"Yeah. I'm okay."
"Are you sure?"
"Yeah. I'm sure."
"Rachel, I know I haven't been fair to you."
"Lauren, you've been more than fair."
"I should have believed you. I should have trusted you."
"Lauren, you couldn't have known."
"I know. But I should have asked."
"Lauren, it's okay."
"No, it's not."
"Lauren, really. It's okay."
"Rachel, I know you lied."
"I know."
"Rachel, I know you kept secrets."
"I know."
"Rachel, I know you betrayed me."
"I know."
"Rachel, I don't know if I can ever forgive you."
"I know."
"But I'm willing to try."
"Lauren, I don't deserve you."
"I know."
"But I'm grateful you're giving me a chance."
"I'm grateful you're still alive."
"I'm grateful Emma's okay."
"Me too."
We stood there in silence, watching Emma play.
"Can we try again?" she asked.
"Try again?"
"Try to be sisters again."
"I don't know."
"Please. I know I've made mistakes. I know I've lied and kept secrets and betrayed you. But I love you, Lauren. I love Emma. I want to be a better sister. I want to be a better aunt."
"Rachel, I don't know if I can ever forgive you."
"I know."
"But I can try."
"Thank you."
"I'm not promising anything."
"I know."
"But I'll try."
"Thank you, Lauren."
She pulled me into a hug.
I didn't hug her back.
May you like
But I didn't push her away.
I was trying.
