Chapter 10 - THE INVITATION
Emma spent the next eight weeks within twenty minutes of the hospital.
She hated being told to rest.
She hated needing rides.
She hated the small plastic organizer of medication beside her bed.
Mostly, she hated how fear made Nathan feel close even from three thousand miles away.
His messages continued once a week.
No pressure.
No questions.
The foundation audit is nearly done.
I am taking a parenting class.
The crib defeated me for two hours.
Mom has photographic evidence and intends to use it against me forever.
Emma smiled at that one.
She did not reply.
Then, three months after the gala, she woke at four in the morning and knew she wanted to see him.
The knowledge irritated her.
She got up, made tea, and opened the yellow notebook.
THINGS I AM ALLOWED TO WANT.
She added:
To see Nathan without promising him anything.
At eight, she typed a message.
If you still want to talk, Friday. 4 PM. Harbor Light Books, Newport, Oregon.
Come alone.
Stay at a hotel.
Do not ask for my apartment address.
She read it five times.
Then sent it.
Nathan received the message while tying a necktie.
He sat down.
Read it.
Read it again.
Priya knocked once and entered.
"Your car is downstairs."
Nathan handed her the phone.
She smiled.
"Don't make that face."
"What face?"
"The one where hope becomes a project plan."
Nathan took the phone back.
"I wasn't."
Priya raised an eyebrow.
"I have known you eleven years."
Nathan typed one word.
Understood.
He canceled nothing beyond what the travel required.
He did not charter a private jet.
He booked a commercial first-class seat because it was the next available flight and spent the entire trip resisting the urge to rehearse.
His security chief wanted to send a car ahead.
Nathan said no.
"Sir, we don't know the area."
"Emma does."
"That's not what I mean."
"I know. No security near the bookstore unless she asks."
Friday at 3:52, Nathan stood across the street from Harbor Light Books in the rain.
The place had blue trim, a hand-painted sign, and a cat asleep in the front window.
Nothing about it belonged to the life he had built.
That seemed appropriate.
At four, Emma appeared behind the glass.
Nathan forgot every sentence he had planned.
Her stomach was unmistakably round beneath a cream sweater.
He gripped the strap of his overnight bag.
Emma unlocked the door.
For several seconds they only stared.
"Hi," she said.
His voice broke.
"Hi."
She stepped aside.
Nathan entered.
He did not hug her.
Emma noticed.
That hurt in a different way.
She pointed toward a table near the window.
"Sit."
He did.
June appeared from the back room carrying two mugs.
"You must be Nathan."
"Yes."
"I'm June."
"Thank you for helping Emma."
June placed the coffee down.
"Don't make gratitude another way to act like she belongs to you."
Nathan blinked.
Emma covered her mouth.
June walked away.
Nathan looked at Emma.
"I like her."
Emma laughed.
The sound almost destroyed him.
They sat in silence.
Finally Emma said, "Why did you come?"
"Because you invited me."
"That's not what I mean."
Nathan looked at the coffee.
"I came to apologize without asking you for anything."
Emma's eyes filled.
He continued before fear could make him prettier than the truth.
"I was unfaithful to you."
She went still.
"You slept with Olivia?"
"No."
Emma's face closed.
Nathan lifted one hand.
"I'm not using that sentence to escape anymore."
She waited.
"I made another woman emotionally important while making my wife feel optional. I told Olivia things I stopped telling you. I gave her time I told you I didn't have. I liked that she saw the impressive version of me. I liked not being reminded of the things I failed at home."
Emma looked down.
"And the text?"
Nathan swallowed.
"She was planning to position herself beside me publicly in a foundation campaign. She said you didn't suspect it."
"Did you know?"
"No."
Emma looked up sharply.
"Do not say that like it fixes anything."
"It doesn't."
Nathan's voice shook.
"I ignored enough of my own life that she could do it."
Emma wiped one tear angrily.
"She interfered with our calendar."
"Yes."
"Our fertility appointments."
"Yes."
"And you approved the trips anyway."
"Yes."
There was no defense.
Emma had wanted one so she could hate it.
His refusal to produce one left nowhere easy for her anger to go.
She reached into her bag.
Nathan watched her remove a small photograph.
The ultrasound.
The one missing from the sleeve.
She placed it in front of him.
"That was what I wanted to give you that night."
Nathan picked it up with both hands.
His face collapsed.
"Emma."
"Don't."
He covered his mouth.
"I'm sorry."
"I know."
"I missed everything."
"You missed a lot."
Nathan nodded.
He accepted the sentence.
Then something moved beneath Emma's sweater.
She looked down.
Nathan saw it.
"Was that—"
Emma nodded.
His eyes filled again.
She hesitated for a long time.
Then held out her hand.
"Come here."
Nathan moved slowly.
Emma took his wrist and placed his palm against the side of her stomach.
Nothing happened.
Nathan barely breathed.
Then a kick landed beneath his hand.
He froze.
Another followed.
Nathan lowered his forehead against the back of Emma's hand.
He cried without trying to hide it.
Emma cried too.
Neither called it forgiveness.
Then Nathan's phone buzzed.
He ignored it.
Again.
Again.
Emma looked at him.
"You should check."
"Not unless you want me to."
"Check."
Nathan looked at the screen.
Foundation counsel.
He answered.
"What happened?"
The lawyer spoke for almost a minute.
Nathan's face changed.
Emma withdrew her hand.
"What?"
Nathan ended the call slowly.
"Olivia accessed your health-benefits information."
Emma went still.
"How much?"
"Provider names. Billing categories. Appointment dates."
Emma felt suddenly exposed in a way the gossip article had not achieved.
Nathan looked sick.
"There's more."
"What?"
"She downloaded the records the week before the gala."
---
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